Do You Say Yes All the Time?
Before you say yes, place the burden of responsibility on the person asking by giving them a small task to complete first, and meet with them only if they do it.
Dandapani shares a filter his guru taught him for the steady stream of requests to grab coffee or pick your brain: give the person something to do first. Read this book and email me the ten key points, or make a list of ten properties and why. Most people never do it, and that tells you what would have happened to your energy.
What this talk covers
- His guru taught him to place the burden of responsibility onto the person making the request.
- A top marketing person overwhelmed by coffee requests was told to give people his favourite book, ask them to write down the ten key points that stood out, and email them before any meeting is set.
- Very few people will do the work, and that becomes the filter you put in front of the yes.
- If someone will not even send an email, they are not going to do any of the things you would tell them over coffee, so the meeting and the travel are a waste of your time.
- People and things that drain you are energy vampires, and since energy is finite like money, you have to manage it and let people show you they deserve it.
You need to show me you deserve it and convince me that I should give you some of it.Dandapani
Questions
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Give them a task first. Ask them to read a specific book and email you the ten key points, or to make a list of ten favourite properties and why. If they do it, meet them. If they do not bother, do not meet them.
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Put a filter in front of the yes. Ask what they are hoping to talk about, point them to a book or resource on it, and ask them to come back after they have worked through it. That way they earn your energy.
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A person or a thing that drains you of your energy. Since energy is what makes your business, relationships and friendships grow, and there is only a finite amount of it, he manages it the way he manages money.
Transcript
827 words · 3:41
One little thing that I've adopted into my life is, because I get a lot like you, you know, messages, you know, let's meet up for coffee, can you get on call this that something my guru taught me is placed the burden of responsibility onto them. So for example, there's this gentleman who's like one of the top marketing people in the Australia region, and he, he had this problem, people always wanted to have coffee with him, they didn't really want to have coffee with him, they just wanted to pick his brain on marketing. So what I told him to say to people is that here's this book, here's 50, 50 books, I've read this book, I've read 50 books on marketing over the last 20 years. This is my favorite book. I want you to read this book,
write down the 10 key points that stood out to you, email it to me, and once I get it, we'll set up a time to meet so we can discuss those points and it'll help me understand
where you are in your marketing journey. How many people you think will read the book and write down the 10 key points? Not as many, right?
So having a filter to the yes before you say yes to something, some sort of filter. Yeah, so if someone's asking you a real estate question, give them a homework to do, something that's doable,
make a list of 10 of your favorite properties and why, and send it to me. And if they do that, then meet with them. But they don't bother to do that.
Don't even meet with them. Yeah, I liked it. One of the things that I did last year, a little bit with that,
was I started like a 6 a.m. walking jogging club. Like on Wednesdays, we'd meet downtown and everybody'd go walk or jog for like an hour. And so as people would say like,
hey, can I come pick your brain? I would say, sure, on Wednesdays at 6 a.m. we're downtown and we have our walking jogging club. And that was really effective for me when I was doing that because really of the, you
know, dozens and dozens of people that would reach out, I think there was plenty of friends that would show up, but there was two or three that were like random miscellaneous social media people inquiries that showed up, right? That showed up and then I got to chat with them and I got to talk to them and, and
they got to pick my brain during that time because they, it wasn't because they had to leave their house at 5 a.m. They'd wake up early, make a plan, leave their house at 5 a.m. Do it with a group of other people.
And so it was a little bit of a filter. And so the I like the idea of doing that through somebody says, hey, can we meet? You say, sure. What do you hope? What are you hoping to talk about?
I'm hoping to talk about this. OK, great. Like here's actually a book that's great on that. Why don't you read that book first? Let me know what you think of it.
And then we'll then then we can talk about chatting after that. So having some way for them to earn if they can earn my energy. Yes reminder don't just say yes exactly earn your energy and sometimes giving them a simple task I tell people to send me an email
Outlining a few things and people won't even do that Aaron So if you won't even send me an email, how is it you're gonna do any of the things? I will tell you over a cup of coffee. You're not gonna do anything That's a waste of my time the travel time for me to get to the coffee shop to come back to sit with you
And then you don't even buy me a coffee. I have to buy my own coffee. Yeah. Yeah.
Like it would like sucking out energy, taking energy. Yeah. And I call those people energy vampires because that's essentially what a lot of people
and things can be energy vampires that drain you of your energy. And our energy is what makes our business grows, our relationships grow, our friendships grow.
And that's only a finite amount. It's the same way like money, right? I need money to invest into something to make my money grow.
But if I don't have enough money, then I can't invest it into something and make it grow. So I need to manage my money. I look at energy the same way.
I have a finite amount of it. I need to manage it. You need to show me you deserve it and convince me that I should give you some of it.