Every yes has a cost.
Most people never pause long enough to ask what that cost is. They agree out of habit, reaction, or fear of missing out. But each time you say yes — to a project, a person, or even a fleeting distraction — you are committing a portion of your finite energy and time.
Every morning, I wake up with the realization that I have a finite amount of energy that day. How I distribute it determines the quality of my day. I choose to invest it proportionately between the people and things that truly matter to me — my wife, my daughter, my purpose. I realize I must be deeply intentional about this.
Even in business, when new opportunities arise, I ask myself: what is the cost of this yes? Am I taking time or energy away from my priorities? Some sacrifices are worth it for a short while. But if it means consistently being less present with my family, it is simply too expensive. Unaffordable in fact.
Most people think about saying yes in grand terms — new jobs, big opportunities, major life choices. But the mystic looks at it on a moment-to-moment basis.
Every yes, however small, has an energetic cost or reward.
Listening to the news. Scrolling through social media. Watching a video online. Engaging in a draining conversation. Saying yes to an extra slice of pizza. Each of these moments either nourishes you or depletes you for a short while, or for hours afterward.
The ability to wisely discern before choosing is the sign of a mature soul. A mystic guards his energy preciously, not from fear of loss but from love of life. You love your life. You realize how precious it is. And so you want to be wisely discerning about where you invest your energy, having come to the realization that life, your life, is a manifestation of where you invest your energy.
It is not only the major decisions in our life that impact our energy, but the countless minor decisions and choices throughout the day that often have a significant impact.
When you design your lifestyle around your purpose and priorities, you reduce unnecessary decisions. You automatically say yes to what aligns and no to what does not. Clarity makes discipline effortless.
Focus gives us the ability to make conscious decisions.
Without focus, we live reactively. We say things we regret. We commit to things we should not. We scatter our energy across a thousand half-hearted yeses and end each day wondering why we feel depleted.
Focus is having control of our awareness. Which means we can control how we respond to an experience and prevent reacting to it. It allows us to see clearly what each decision costs, or what reward it provides. With focus, we can respond consciously rather than react impulsively. This is about consciously investing energy in alignment with our purpose.
When you know your purpose, you know your priorities. And when you know your priorities, decisions become simple. You stop saying yes to everything that merely wants your attention, and start saying yes only to what truly deserves your energy.
Be observant of the countless mundane things we engage with throughout our day. Are they energy giving or energy taking? Food, music, drinks, what we listen to, read, and watch. Our posture. Our bed. The state of our home. The state of our mind.
So the next time life asks something of you — pause. Do not ask, “Do I have time?”
Ask instead: is this yes worth the energy it will cost me?
